This story by Anjana Appachana describes an Indian mother’s feelings of anguish, grief and betrayal upon reading the perfunctory first letter home from her younger daughter who has travelled to America to complete a Ph.D. Much of the story involves her thoughts on how best to reply. These range from ranting about personal care and the dangers of American life, providing “chatty” family news and encouraging her to find and marry a suitable Indian man, and confronting her about her abrupt decision to leave in such anger. Themes include tradition vs. westernization, independence, marriage and gender roles, double standards, self-pity.
There may be more to the daughter’s abrupt decision to study in America than the usual story of an educated young woman wanting to free herself from the strictures of Indian culture. It is inferred that her anger could have been brought about by something that happened in her once close (perhaps too close) relationship with her brother-in-law. This would account for her pining over one of his handkerchiefs, and his absence on the day she left for the airport.
Set in the 1980s, the conflict between tradition and westernization is illustrated in the mother’s response to her daughter cutting her hair in the style of all the thousands of short-haired, western-looking Delhi girls. Ironically, the mother later reflects on how her own parents were dismayed when she played tennis with other men (and) wore lipstick and bras.
Original Text / PDF (5,650 words)